Ask Me Anything You Want

I honestly believe that there are genuine psychics in this world, I really do.  I know that that likely sounds far-fetched but hear me out.

We’ve all seen at least one video of a child barely old enough to tie his own shoelaces playing a piano better than a seasoned professional.  We’ve all heard stories about people given just weeks or months to live who are still alive today, twenty years after their grim diagnosis.  Plus we all know at least one person who had given up on finding love and then met their soul mate the next day.  If all of those crazy things can happen, then why can’t there be psychics?

I wish I was psychic.  It would make my job as a psychic so much easier.  Now before you go all judgemental on me for stealing money from innocent people, you should know that I’ve never stolen so much as a penny my whole life.  I give my customers exactly what they pay for: a shoulder to cry on, some much needed advice and, most of all, hope.

People don’t go to psychics because everything’s hunky dory in their lives.  They go because things are messed up, they’re worried, or they’re unsure of how to proceed.  They need someone to tell them that everything’s going to be okay and that the good guys will win out in the end.

It’s not hard to pass yourself off as a psychic.  All you have to do is keep your answers general and somewhat vague.  Say someone comes in and tells me that they want to know what’s going to happen in their career.  That right there tells me that there’s trouble in paradise.  Maybe they’re afraid of losing their job, perhaps they’re worried they’ll never advance, or it could be they’re thinking of switching gears.  I’ll look at my cards, or stare at their palms, or gaze into my crystal ball and then say something along the lines of “I sense that you’re not entirely comfortable in your current situation.  There are things about it that trouble you.”  Everyone dislikes their job or is stressed over it to some extent, and that’s when the flood gates open up, at least enough for me to figure out what it is they really want to hear.

Then, depending upon their circumstances, I’ll tell them that they must be on guard, or that I see them working in a field about which they’re truly passionate, or how I see them putting their leadership skills to use.  They walk away feeling better about things after that and more at peace.  Now if you’ll excuse me, my ten o’clock is here.

“Hello, my name is Mystic Meg.  What can I help you with today?”

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